Manoy

I wonder what it feels like to have an older brother. I have the best older sister and younger brother a middle kid could ever ask for, but I sometimes wonder how life would be different if my mom didn't have two miscarriages before my sister. It's either there would be five of us kids, or if my parents decided to stop at three, then I wouldn't be around. It must be cool to have an older brother to ward off bullies and bad boyfriends, and to be a playmate or personal chauffeur.

My mom is the eldest and she has three younger sisters and four younger brothers. She never had a kuya as well. My dad is the youngest with four brothers and one sister before him. "Manoy" is kuya or older brother in Bikolano, the local dialect in my dad's hometown.

I don't know what it's like to have an older brother - and much less what it feels like to lose one. Tonight, my dad's eldest manoy passed away. I can only imagine the grief; how I wish I was now with my family - especially to my dad, my tita and my cousins - to give my support and love and hugs.

I know how much everyone looked up to our family's Manoy Ronnie. After my grandfather passed away at an early age, he took on a father figure for my dad and his siblings. I've often heard from my dad how grateful he is, and forever will be, as his manoy helped put him through school which paved the way for his life. Papa Ronnie must have sacrificed much to do that and so to me, this generosity and unselfishness will always define him as The Manoy in the family.

We will remember and miss you, Papa Ronnie a.k.a. Dadi-O.